Monday, May 7, 2012
I Don't Belong
The one thing that I continually struggle with on a day-to-day basis is a feeling of belonging. It's part of my personality to have a huge group of friends instead of one primary group of friends. But with that kind of exuberant popularity comes a price: there isn't a group of friends that I can call my own. If some of my friends hang out together without inviting me, I don't have the right to say, "well, why didn't you invite me?" because I'm simply not close enough to them to even be considered a priority. Even with my roommates, who I consider some of my closest friends, I have no right to exercise that saying. Sure, I might have a few close friends (who don't know each other) that I can spend hours and hours with without ever getting sick of them, but it still isn't a group of friends that I can ask to go anywhere with if I wanted to go check something out or go explore somewhere. I've continually tried to find this group SOMEWHERE but I'm also afraid of being so close to them that if something were to happen with this group, I would have nowhere to go. I guess both scenarios have its pros and cons.